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my willingness to buy ALL the bitcoin is no illusion!
People were paying stupid money for Beanies, too. Until they weren't.
And just think about it: imagine you bought all the bitcoins. Why in the world would somebody want one? To make you rich?

they would want one so they could save 50% off starbuck gift card?
Sounds like the sort of folk who'll pay you with PayPal & charge back.
edit: but seriously, you don't want a currency to be concentrated like that -- no incentive for anyone other than yourself to value it/use it.
This is not the case for real money, which will always be needed, if for nothing else other than to pay taxes (or get oppressed updabutt by jackbooted thugs).